Fallen Angels Read online

  Fallen Angels

  Book Two

  The Ravyn Series

  By

  Natalie Kiest

  Dedicated to all those brave enough to take on the many battles of love.

  Published by Defiant Mind Books, LLC

  Copyright © 2014 by Natalie Kiest

  All rights reserved. This book or any portion thereof may not be reproduced or used in any manner whatsoever without the express written permission of the publisher except for the use of brief quotations in a book review.

  Chapter One

  Kara

  Downward Spiral

  “I’m what!” I exclaimed in disbelief.

  Lucifer just stared down at me, looking like he wanted to cry. I mean, we were in no way on friendly speaking terms, but this was one hell of a sick joke! My best friend Angela, with her always-stunning natural beauty, looked as sick as I felt while she stared out the window. Her inability to look me in the eye spoke louder than any words Lucifer could say.

  When Lucifer didn’t reply I glared at Angela. “He’s joking right? I mean, this is just sick, even for you Lucifer!” I said, walking the much-needed line of denial. I couldn’t tolerate any more nonsense from my demon friends, because what I was hearing made my stomach bubble with nausea. I shot out of bed and pushed past Lucifer, running for the bathroom, making it just in time.

  Hugging the porcelain throne had become a regular endeavor the last couple of weeks. I was just sick with worry and grief. The nightmares of my torture and Ravyn’s death, followed by her lively appearance. I was stressed, and it was making me ill. Well, that’s what I had been telling myself anyway.

  Nebiros had decided to call Lucifer to help identify my ailing condition. I hated him for disclosing this horrible diagnoses, but I couldn’t deny the words of the King of the Underworld, even though I was desperately trying to.

  “Kara?” Angela whispered as she entered the bathroom.

  “This can’t be Angela. Not this, anything but this!” I replied in defeat.

  “It’s not a joke Kara. I wish it were, but it’s real. You’re pregnant.” Angela spoke slowly, carefully, so every word would sink in.

  I knew Angie would never joke about this. Her words could be written in stone. I could see that huge stone wall in front of me, carved with my horrific news. “Kara Wombley, you are carrying the bastard child of the demon who raped you.”

  What do you do when you hear news like this? You cry, until you can’t cry anymore. Then you sit and stare in disbelief for days. I was getting pretty good at flipping the switch that sent me into zombie mode, which was having no emotion at all. I didn’t feel a damn thing. I didn’t want to. And again my otherworldly friends were stuck watching me ignore life.

  The days pass rather quickly when life has no meaning or value; they merge into one endless existence of nothing. The nightmares I had worked so hard to repress before my unexpected news now pulled me back into that white room. My torturers seemed to buzz around me, mocking, cutting, and laughing like I was still trapped with them.

  Everything that had happened since Ravyn had re-entered my life came rushing back. I finally understood why she came back. All along she had been fighting to prevent this child from coming to life. She knew all this time. I had been warned of this, but I was too blinded by my obsession with Ravyn to take it seriously. It was all my fault! It was a conclusion that haunted me daily.

  My appetite left when I got the news, and when Angela forced me to eat I wasn’t able to hold it down, yet my belly seemed to be getting bigger every day. I could hear Angela and Nebiros whispering words of concern to each other while they watched me fade into nothing. Angela was oddly concerned for both me and the baby, and Nebiros insisted it needed to be removed like it was some sort of deadly tumor.

  My mind always sided with Angela, which was an even harder pill to swallow. Denial, confusion, and human nature argued amongst themselves constantly. How could I ever want to keep this thing growing inside of me? I could never love it. Could I? I could feel its life moving within me. It is a part of me, I thought, rubbing my hand over my noticeable baby bump. Nebiros snapped his eyes to mine when the thought fluttered wildly in my head.

  He was always snatching the thoughts from my mind and I hated it. “Get out of my head!” I said coldly. It was the first time I had said anything since I heard the news, which was two, maybe three weeks ago. My zombie switch had abruptly flipped off, thanks to Nebiros. Slowly sitting up, I glared at him, cursing his demon soul via thoughts.

  “You’re broadcasting. I’m not digging in that jumbled mind of yours,” Nebiros said softly.

  “If you don’t like it then you can leave. I don’t need your judgment Nebiros!” Silence claimed the room when he refused to leave or argue with me.

  “It is her decision, old friend.” The thick English accent suddenly ended the awkward silence, and all eyes in the room turned to the doorway.

  “Devlin?” I breathed, and for the first time since my devastating news a smile spread over my lips. I studied Devlin’s handsome face while he stood in the doorway. His black hair was longer than I remembered, but it had been nearly two months since I last saw him. He still looked good, but his familiar face was missing its usual charming grin. Now he just looked calm and sad.

  “Hello, my dear.” He greeted me with a slight bow before moving to sit on the bed next to me.

  “Devlin, it was all my fault. Lilith is dead because of me!” I cried, again. It was all I did these days.

  “No, Kara, it’s not your fault. Lilith wanted to help. She loved you and wanted you home where you would be safe,” he assured me, gently wiping my tears away.

  “I’ve been so worried about you. Where have you been?” I asked.

  “Traveling, but it was time to come home and check on my girls.”

  Angela patted him on the shoulder and kissed him on the cheek before leaving the room. Nebiros quickly followed, leaving the two of us alone to chat. “I’m so glad you’re here,” I said while I hugged him tightly.

  “Me too. I see we are expecting a new addition to the family,” he said, placing his large hand over my small belly.

  “I’m so lost Devlin. I just don’t know what to do,” I said.

  “You do what your heart tells you, my dear. No one can tell you otherwise,” he said firmly.

  “My heart is torn, Devlin. Everyone wants me to get rid of it, and I know it sounds crazy, but it’s a part of me. I just don’t know.”

  He smiled at me, almost like a proud father. “You will know exactly what to do when the time is right. In the meantime, you need a little break from this room. Would you care to join me?”

  He was desperately trying to dig me out of my hole, but I had only left the house once since my torture, and that proved to be another foolish mistake.

  He could see the fear in my eyes at the very mention of going out. “It’s a beautiful fall day to sit by a fire. Maybe some s’mores? Just out back on the patio of course,” he urged, holding his hand out, his eyes pleading with me.

  “Just the two of us?” I asked, gently running my finger over the scar covering my wrist. I often did so to remind myself to be careful.

  “If that is what you wish, my dear,” he replied, his eyes following my finger.

  “You won’t let anything bad happen to me?”

  “Never. If you do not feel comfortable we will come right back,” Devlin promised.

  “Okay,” I nervously agreed. Slowly sliding out of bed, I forgot that I was wearing shorts and a scoop neck t-shirt. Devlin’s eyes quickly found a majority of my scars peeking out from my clothing. “Pretty ugly, huh?”

  “It pains me to see what he did to you.”

  Devlin’s sincerity caught me
off guard. I had always trusted Devlin, always been able to talk to him about anything, and he always offered good advice. So for the first time I spoke of my experience. “The scars are Remy’s handy work. He was responsible for this.” I pointed to my belly, joking about my torture.

  “Sometimes life has a funny way of showing us how blessed we are,” he whispered, hooking his arm through mine.

  It was an odd statement, one that I really couldn’t reply to nicely at this point in my life, but I felt that Devlin had figured out how blessed he was, even after Lilith’s death. It took some gentle coaxing to get me to step outside, which made me think of the only other time I had left the house since my return.

  I had run out of the house without a single thought for my safety when Lucifer told me we were going to see Ravyn. I wondered if I would respond the same way if Devlin told me she was waiting for me on the patio. I quickly shook Ravyn from my mind and sat by the fire pit. Devlin wrapped a blanket around me and sat next to me.

  “I love this time of year,” he said with a smile.

  I used to love it, but now I seemed to hate everything around me. “It’s cold and everything looks dead,” I whispered, looking around the yard at the dried brown leaves that covered the dying grass.

  “Where’s Abby?”

  “Probably in the basement, training. She hasn’t taken you-know-who’s disappearance very well. The family is falling to pieces. I don’t know why you would want to come back.” I spoke without any emotion while staring into the fire. I used to love being around fire, playing with the elements. Now, I had no desire to use my powers and often wished I never had them at all.

  “She always was the glue. I met with her father a couple weeks ago. That’s when I learned about the coming addition to the family. He’s worried about you.”

  I held my hand up to stop Devlin from speaking further about Lucifer. “If he was so concerned, he would have answered my prayers while I was being cut to pieces and raped. No one came. Everyone ignored my pleas for help. So I don’t want to hear about how worried he is!” I snapped, surprised by how good it felt to show my true emotion about the situation.

  “That’s not fair Kara! You can be mad at Lucifer all you want, but we searched and fought to bring you home. Ravyn felt every ounce of your fear and pain; it tore her to pieces not being able to get to you. She did unspeakable things to find you. Hell, your own mother witnessed the things she did just to find you. Lilith gave her life to get you out of there, and you saw with your own eyes what Ravyn did to ensure your safety. You have no right saying we ignored your pleas,” Devlin said.

  “Wait, my mom watched her do what exactly?” I asked.

  “That is a question for her. From what I have heard, Ravyn’s humanity died in that room along with her victims.” He paused, shaking his head. “She did what she had to in order to find you. We all did.”

  “She has wings now. I don’t know what that means. I just know she wouldn’t look at me when I saw her. I think she knew I was pregnant. She knew before anyone. I thought she loved me, but she was too disgusted to even look at me.” I didn’t really know how she felt, this was just my assumption.

  “I ran into her twice in my travels. She should have died that night. Shoving that sword through her beating heart, she wanted to die. Her father couldn’t handle losing her too, so he brought her to her full potential. Her human bloodline died with her heart. Now, she is a full blood, hence the wings,” he explained.

  “Why hasn’t she come back?” I wondered.

  “Ravyn doesn’t want to live. She failed you, Kara. She walks the earth lost in her own self-loathing. She is unsure what to do and where to go.” He chuckled at her dilemma.

  “I hope she finds what she’s looking for,” I said nonchalantly. My heart was crumbling even as the words left my mouth. I didn’t want her to die; I wanted her here with me. I wanted her to tell me I was still beautiful. I wanted to feel her loving touch and to see that cocky grin when I woke up in her arms.

  “I think she will,” he replied. My eyes snapped to his. “Anyway, I found some things for you in my travels.” He smiled, ignoring my worried look as he reached behind my chair, pulling a couple of large bags into view.

  “Are you back for good?” I asked.

  “I will be here for a while,” he assured me before digging into the first bag.

  His answer made me smile. I sure could use a break from Nebiros, not to mention Devlin was easier to talk to. “Good. You really didn’t have to get me anything.” I waved the bag away.

  “Just a few things that caught my eye. Some are just to make you smile again, and one I searched for.” He handed me a small box.

  I opened it slowly. A round pewter pendant with a strange flower in the center seemed like an odd gift.

  “It’s the Scottish thistle. It represents bravery, courage, and loyalty,” he said as he pulled the necklace from the box and carefully put it around my neck.

  “It’s beautiful. I don’t think it represents me though,” I replied, rubbing my fingers over the flower pendant.

  “It most certainly does, my dear. Now, don’t be upset with me, but I searched for weeks to find this,” he said, pulling a tall, thin, triangular green bottle from the bag.

  “Perfume?” I asked as I uncorked it. Taking a whiff, I quickly re-corked the bottle. The pervasive aroma of mildew made me want to gag, and of course my reaction made Devlin laugh.

  Taking the bottle from me he leaned closer. “It’s an ancient healing remedy. A nasty concoction of herbs, oils, and fungi that works miracles.”

  “Healing remedy? For what?” I asked, wishing never to smell it again.

  “Scars.” He took my hand, slowly pushing the blanket away from my wrist. “A very little bit of this will go a long way. I know it smells so I bought you some perfume to mask the smell. Use it once a day, every day, and your scars will fade. Maybe as your scars fade, your memories of how they were formed will fade with them. One day your love for life and all of its wonders will come back.” He gently rubbed the oil into the scar around my wrist.

  His gentle touch and hopeful words brought a tiny bit of hope back. Devlin was right about one thing. I was blessed to have friends like him. It also brought a sudden need to tell my story, to actually let it out. To trust Devlin and hope he would accept me the same way he always had.

  My horrible experience spilled forth while Devlin sat listening, enduring my every word. I could see it pained him to hear every detail of my torture, but the more I talked about it the more I felt a weight being lifted from me.

  Telling my story helped me accept what had happened in my life. I couldn’t change it, couldn’t hide from it. It had already happened, and talking to Devlin on this cool fall day was the first step I needed to take so I could get my life back.

  I knew my life would never be normal, but I was still here and would do my best to enjoy the small things that made me smile. When I was finally done talking, Devlin smiled and gave me a curt nod. “Why are you smiling?” I asked, worried.

  “Thank you for confiding in me. Do you see any beauty around you now?” he asked.

  I looked around at the cloudy grey sky and the barren trees and was surprised to say I did see small glimpses of beauty in life on that cool October day. Devlin was my miracle. He single-handedly brought me back to life.

  Devlin continued to make it a daily ritual for the two of us to spend time out on the patio, and as the days passed I saw more and more beauty in the world around me. I was coming back to life in spirit, but my pregnancy was taking its toll on my body, and my need to see Ravyn had returned with a vengeance.

  Nebiros had put an I.V. in me, and was pumping fluids and vitamins into my body on a daily basis. He was worried, and it showed when he attached the bags of fluid to my I.V., in his gentle touch when he inspected the bruising on my arms. He was actually showing more emotion than my Mom, who was always by my side. I knew she was being strong for me, but I wondered how long she
could carry this strength for both of us. When I showed them the multiple bruises covering my belly, Mom quickly left my room and Nebiros kissed my forehead then followed her. I didn’t understand why they left without a single word, but it was comforting to know that I would be missed by all of my friends.

  A month had passed since Devlin made his return, and I was busy preparing to ask him for another favor while I stared out at the light snow falling over the patio.

  “How are we feeling this morning, my dear?” His voice greeted me when he entered the kitchen.

  “I’m tired. I don’t think I will last much longer, Devlin,” I replied.

  “We will figure this out. You should be resting,” he insisted, leading me to the kitchen table.

  “Do you know where Ravyn is?” I blurted out as he eased me down into the chair. His eyes snapped to mine, then he stepped away shaking his head. “I need to see her Devlin. I need to say goodbye.”

  “Even if I knew where she was, I would never take you to her. She is dangerous and would not think twice about harming you.”

  “She won’t hurt me. I begged her to kill me last time, and she wouldn’t lay a finger on me. I need this Devlin. The baby is killing me and you know it.”

  “You don’t know what you’re saying. You and the baby are going to be just fine. You don’t need to see Ravyn. You can’t.”

  “I will find her with or without your help, and when I do I’m going to see her,” I said, struggling to stand. Gingerly, I walked out of the kitchen.

  “I know where she is,” Devlin said, stopping my slow trek up the stairs. “Trust me when I say you will not like what Ravyn has become.”

  His warning still made me smile with relief. The simple thought of seeing her again instantly lifted my spirit. “I don’t have to like it. I don’t want to wonder what might have happened. I need closure,” I said.

  “Will you move on when you find this closure?” His question struck me as odd, but I agreed anyway.

  Chapter Two